It’s the end of January, and you know what that means. It’s time to get together with your friends, crack open some beers, and gather around the TV. It’s time to laugh and cry and shout obscenities. That’s right people, are you ready for some State of the Union address? We are, and we’ve come up with a drinking game to prove it.

The rules are simple. When any of the words or phrases are said, you drink the corresponding amount. If any of the actions happen, you drink the corresponding amount. Make sense? Good, then let’s get our drunken State of the Union on.

Words or Phrases:

“Let me be clear” – sip
(If he’s actually clear – pound)
“Make no mistake” – sip
(If he actually makes a mistake – pound)
“Healthcare” – sip
“Obamacare”– pound
“Scott Brown” – sip
“My name is Barack Obama, and I also have a truck” – pound
“Pants on the ground” – pound
“Death panel” – sip
“Sarah Palin is a genius” – pound
“Afghanistan”  – sip
“It reminds of my childhood in Kenya” – pound
“Spending freeze”– sip
“That’s why I’m naming Glenn Beck as my new Secretary of State” – six pack
“Special Olympics”– sip
“For the record, Ayla Brown is no longer available…if you know what I mean” -pound
“Beer Summit”– sip
“My Muslim faith” – pound
“Across the aisle” – sip
“We are all Kenyans now” – pound
“Jackass” – sip
“That is why our newly signed pact with the devil will help” – pound
“Unfriend”– sip
“Rectum? Damn near killed him! HAHAHA” – pound
“Same-sex”  – sip
“Which is why I won the Nobel Prize.” – pound
“Party crashers” –sip
“By the power vested in me, Massachusetts is no longer a state.” – pound
“Tweet” – sip
“Thanks to the wisdom of Rush Limbaugh.” – pound
“Stimulus package” –sip
“I’m proud of the balls the Democrats have shown this past year.” – pound
“Bailout” – sip
“Pull the plug on grandma” – pound
“I think Heidi Montag looks good after her surgery” – pound
“Change isn’t easy” – sip
“Who dat?” – pound
“It won’t happen over night” – sip
“Teabaggers” – sip
“Anal” – pound
“I’ve had it with these motherfucking snakes in my motherfucking government.” – pound
“Socialism” – sip
“The teabaggers make a good point.” – pound
“Bush’s fault” – sip
“Hold on,  I just got a text.” – pound
“Acted stupidly” – sip
“I would like to commend the Supreme Court on their recent decision, and welcome our newest member of the Senate, Senator Ronald McDonald.” – pound
“Underwear bomber” – sip
“So suck it Biden!” – pound
“Appalachian trail” – sip
“Excuse me while I whip this out.” – pound
“Snooki come up here so we can do shoots” – pound

On-Camera Actions or Applause:

Shot of Michelle – sip
Shot of GOP member NOT smiling – sip
When ONLY DEMS clap – sip
When everybody claps – sip
When ONLY GOP clap – pound
When a member of the GOP is smiling – pound
Joe Wilson yells, “You’re telling the truth!” – pound
Kanye West interrupts Obama, but then lets him finish – pound
Joe Lieberman gets up and switches sides of the aisle – pound
Teabagging – pound
Senator Byrd is removed from the chamber due to a “bomb” in his underwear – pound
A shot of Senator Brown watching from the cab of his truck – pound
Joe Lieberman gets up and attempts to filibuster the speech…and succeeds – pound
Nancy Pelosi never blinks – pound
Sarah Palin resigns from Fox News half way through the speech – pound
Obama pulls out a toy lightsaber and challenges Michelle Bachmann to a duel –pound
“The Situation” joins Obama at the podium for some fist pumping – pound
Barney Frank punches Snooki in the jaw – Buy Barney a beer!

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